Jehovah’s Gift Exchange

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Kurt, the office manager, had gathered all the office drones into one of the conference rooms at nine in the morning. This was surprising since the annual Christmas gift exchange was planned for two pm, which would most likely be held in the same conference room. Brad ushered people in and directed a couple of the warehouse workers towards the tree. They promptly began to take it down.

“What the fuck,” Natalia whispered to herself.

“Heard that,” Brad laughed.

“You know what’s going on?”

“No,” Brad replied.

Brad and Natalia walked into the room and got a sharp glance from one of their coworkers, Sonia, a short haired bleach blonde woman in her early forties. She was a bit abrasive and no one in the office liked her. She was twice divorced and newly single. Per rumors her tits had been enhanced twice and she was a huge cokehead. None of these were ever proven. But her tits were huge for her petite frame. She would often show up to work with red eyes and white lips. And she got constant nosebleeds. But that could be attributed to their office being on the 40th floor of a 55-floor building.

Brad and Natalia found seats towards the back as they were some of the last to find out about the meeting. They watched as the fake Christmas tree was disassembled and taken out of the room. The gifts that the office had purchased remained on the floor. Kurt’s secretary brought in a bag of brown paper bags and handed it to him.

“Everyone here,” Brad asked.

“Doug had a doctor’s appointment,” one of the office drones replied.

“Anyone else,” he asked again.

No one said anything.

“Let’s get started,” Kurt exhaled.

Natalia looked out towards the office and noticed the decorations were being taken down.

“Look,” she whispered to Brad.

Brad looked out onto the floor and was shocked to see what was going on.

“As you can see,” Kurt started, “we received several complaints about the Christmas decorations.”

“Who complained,” one of the drones yelled out.

“Was it that Muzzie from IT,” another yelled out.

“Stop,” Kurt yelled, “we just settled that harassment lawsuit last month, we don’t need another one.”

Kurt composed himself and looked around.

“So as you can see we’ve taken down the decorations and tree. So, for the rest of the year there will no more decorations or any mention of Christmas or any talk of Hanukkah or Kwanzaa. If you have a Menorah or that fake Menorah that black people use for that fake holiday at your desk take it down.”

“Great,” Brad whispered.

“They didn’t complain about your Menorah last year,” Natalia whispered.

“As for the Secret Santa gift exchange. Well we’re going still have it. But it won’t be called Secret Santa or White Elephant. It will just be called a gift exchange. And as you can see Laura brought in some paper bags. Those are for the gifts you purchased. So, take the gift you bought for your coworkers and unwrap them and place them in a paper bag. Please label it with a pen or magic marker. If you forgot who you had for the gift exchange Laura has list. So please gather your gifts and unwrap them and put them in a bag. If anyone has any questions, please come see me in my office or ask HR. Thanks everyone.”

“Stupid,” Natalia said to Brad.

“I know,” he replied, “this is horse shit.”

Kurt walked out of the room with his gift and Laura began to hand out the bags.

“Who did you get,” Brad asked.

“Sonia,” she replied, “and you?”

“Dave,” he replied, “got him a pen set. What did you get Sonia?”

“I got her some bath bombs,” she replied, “spent a little more than I thought. It was a $20 maximum, right?”

“I think so,” Brad replied, “I think I spent 25 on Dave.”

Laura reached Brad and Natalia and handed them each a paper bag.

“Sucks doesn’t it,” Natalia commented.

“Yeah,” Laura laughed.

Brad and Natalia got out of their chairs and grabbed their gifts.

“You going anywhere for lunch,” she asked.

“Probably that deli in the lobby,” he replied.

“Mind if I come with,” she asked.


“Good,” she replied, “I’ll see you then.”

They went to their separate cubicles and began working. Brad pulled down his Menorah and put it in his desk. He unwrapped his gift and stuffed it in the paper bag. He labeled it with Dave’s name and stapled it shut. He put it by his feet and exhaled.

Natalia took a seat at her cubicle and unwrapped her gift. She gasped as she opened the brown box that was supposed to contain a set of bath bombs. Instead she found a candy cane colored dildo.

“Fuck me,” she whispered.

She stuffed the phallic object back into the box. How could she be so stupid. This was meant for her casino oyna girlfriend, not the gift exchange. She picked up her phone and frantically dialed her girlfriend.

“Marcy,” she whispered in the receiver.

“Hey babe,” Marcy replied, “you okay? You never call me from your office.”

“Yeah,” she replied, “are you still at home?”

“Yeah,” she laughed, “just got back from Yoga.”

“Good,” Natalia replied, “do me a favor. Grab the gift under the tree that’s in the Disney wrapping paper.”

“Okay,” Marcy laughed, “everything okay?”

“Yeah our Secret Santa got canceled,” she started.

“Canceled,” Marcy asked.

“I mean it didn’t get canceled only changed to a gift exchange. They took down all the Christmas decorations. And we have to the gifts in paper bags.”


“Someone complained.”

“Got the gift,” Marcy replied.

“Um,” Natalia stuttered, “open it please.”

She could hear the wrapping paper being ripped open.

“Aw thank you,” Marcy said loudly, “bath bombs from that place we like.”

“Shit,” Natalia laughed, “that was for my gift exchange, I have a present for you here.”

“So you didn’t get me bath bombs,” Marcy laughed.

“I think I did,” Natalia replied, “they’re probably in the back somewhere. Just leave them on the kitchen table. I’ll pick them up on my lunch break.”

“Okay, I could bring them by your office.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Natalia laughed, “I’ll pick it up on my lunch break. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

They both hung up around the same time. Natalia panicked for a second before throwing the gift into her desk.

Brad was suddenly disturbed from his focus when Laura walked up to him.

“Brad, Sonia needs to see you,” she said looking down at him.

“What does she need,” he asked.

“Said there was an error with your last report,” she replied.

“All right,” he exhaled.

“Good luck,” she smiled as she walked away.

Brad got up from his cubicle and walked towards Sonia’s annex. When he got there she was on the phone. She motioned with her hand to wait. Brad listened in on her banal conversation with whoever she was talking to. She rambled on for nearly two minutes before finally hanging up. Sonia pulled out a sheet of paper from her desk. Brad realized it was a simple oversight and he had forgotten to check off one of the items on the list. As Brad was about to leave he noticed she left her desk drawer open. He noticed a pamphlet under a folder. It was a Watch Tower magazine, the Jehovah’s Witness newsletter. Brad quickly figured it out. It was Sonia that had forced the office to change the Christmas gift exchange. But he could have been mistaken. It might have been one of the Muslim employees. Had to be a coincidence.

On the back to his desk he stopped by the breakroom and grabbed an energy drink. He scanned over the magazines that were spread out on one of the tables. He noticed the same magazine under an old issue of GQ. He picked it up and tossed it in the trash can. It was Sonia! She did this to the office.

“Cunt,” he whispered.

He took a big sip of his drink and walked back to his desk. He noticed two or three people talking with Kurt. He noticed Natalia walking towards Kurt’s office.

“Hey,” she said to him.

“Are you going to Kurt’s office,” he asked.

“Yeah,” she replied, “asking if I can leave early. This whole gift exchange thing has pissed me off.”

“Same here,” he replied, “I mean I’m pissed but I don’t want to leave early.”

He started to walk away.

“Wait,” he let out.

“I think I figured out who fucked up the gift exchange,” he smiled.

“Oh shit who?”

He leaned over and whispered in her ear, “It was Sonia.”

“What,” she laughed.

“I saw a watch tower magazine in her desk,” he replied, “and one in the breakroom.”

“Are you sure,” she asked.

“For sure,” he laughed.

“I think I might stay,” Natalia laughed as she walked away.

Suddenly Sonia walked past them and entered the bathroom.

“Show me,” Natalia asked.

They both walked briskly towards the annex. Brad looked around and made sure she wasn’t walking back. He opened the desk and pushed the folder out of the way. Natalia’s eyes opened wide and put her hand over her mouth. He opened another drawer to reveal an entire stack of watch tower magazines. Brad noticed Sonia’s wallet setting in the drawer as well. He looked around and flipped it open.

“Bingo,” Brad laughed.

Staring at them was a card that read: No Blood.

“What the fuck,” Natalia gasped.

“I know,” he replied as he pushed the drawers shut.

They quickly exited her office area and walked back to their respective desks.

“I canlı casino have the perfect gift for that bitch,” she laughed.

“Did you get her in the Secret Santa?”

“Yes,” she replied, “and I accidently wrapped a gift for my girlfriend and brought it in.”

“What is it,” he asked.

“You’ll see,” she laughed.

“It better be worth it,” he replied.

“It will be,” she laughed.

The rest of the day chugged along and moved at its typical pace. Natalia and Brad had lunch at the deli in the lobby. Kurt was bombarded by a few of his subordinates about who forced the office to take down the decorations. A few people left early in protest. But a few people stuck around. Natalia, Brad and their other coworkers reluctantly placed their new brown bag presents on the table in the conference room. Natalia placed Sonia’s gift towards the back of the pile in hopes of her opening it last. After lunch ended Brad and Natalia phoned some of their coworkers and told them they believed they knew who complained about the decorations. And they had a surprise for them.

When two o’clock rolled around people shuffled into the conference room. Someone connected their iPhone to the speakers and Christmas music began to fill the room. The chairs in the room had be arraigned in a circle around the table in the middle of the room.

“No,” Kurt warned as he glared at the person who hooked up their phone.

“What can we listen to,” the office drone asked.

“Just put the radio on,” Kurt laughed.

“What if holiday music comes on,” someone else asked.

“Put that rap station on,” Kurt replied, “I doubt they’ll play any Christmas music.”

The station was quickly changed and rap music played on a low volume in the room. An office worker appeared at the door. Kurt began a quick conversation with him.

“it’s bullshit I know,” was all Brad heard as he and Natalia walked into the office.

“Hey Kurt,” Natalia asked.

“Yeah,” he replied.

“I have a special gift for Sonia,” she whispered, “make sure she opens it last.”

“I will,” he replied.

The room fell silent as Sonia walked into the room. Laura followed quickly behind her and some of their other coworkers. There were about fifteen people in the room. Only a few people were missing. Kurt stood at the front of the room and forced a smile across his face.

“Okay everyone,” he started, “let’s get started with the Christm… the gift exchange. Let’s get started!”

Laura shut the door and began to hand out the gifts.

“First one is for Dave,” she announced.

“Yeah,” Dave exclaimed as he grabbed the paper bag.

He ripped open the bag and pulled out the box inside.

“Yes,” he laughed, “those pens I like.”

“That was from me,” Brad exhaled.

“Thanks dude,” Dave smiled.

The gifts began to flow at a steady pace. Most of them were small gifts, a tie, a few boxes of candy, someone got a gift card to Amazon, Natalia got an iPad case, and Brad got a can of the hair product he liked.

“One more left,” Kurt laughed, “looks like it’s for Sonia.”

“Did Sonia get anyone anything,” someone called out.

“No,” she replied, “and I don’t want anything.”

“Well someone got you something,” Kurt laughed.

“Okay,” she said as Laura handed her the bag.

Sonia pulled open the bag and reached in. She pulled out a brown box and ripped the paper off. She dropped the box on the floor and let out a gasp. The entire room erupted in laughter as the red and white striped dildo flopped to the ground followed by a small bottle of lube.

“What the fuck,” she yelled.

“This isn’t funny assholes,” she yelled.

“It wasn’t funny fucking up our Christmas party,” Kurt yelled back.

“Christmas is a Pagan holiday and an abomination to Jehovah,” she replied.

“Fuck you,” someone else yelled.

“I was going to dress up like Santa until this morning,” another person yelled.

“Christmas is offensive and evil,” she yelled.

As Sonia was about to leave Natalia got up from her seat and picked up the dildo and shoved it in her face.

“Get away from me dyke,” she yelled.

“You ruined Christmas,” Brad yelled.

Sonia looked around the room and saw the angry expressions on her coworkers faces. She looked down at the red and white dildo that Natalia had in her hands.

“Okay,” she started, “you motherfuckers want a party. I’ll give you one!”

She reached down and grabbed Natalia’s hand and guided the dildo to her face. She opened her mouth wide and engulfed the dildo in her mouth and began to perform simulated oral sex on the object. The rest of the people in the room began to cheer and clap.

“Someone grab my purse,” she said as she took her kaçak casino mouth off the dildo.

A female coworker rushed out of the room and ran down the hallway.

“Who wants to make a beer run,” Kurt asked, “I’ll pay you back.”

“I’ll have my girlfriend get us some booze,” Natalia laughed as Sonia continued to suck the dildo.

Natalia made a quick phone to Marcy and told her to get as much liquor as possible. Sonia took the dildo out of her mouth and kissed Natalia hard on the mouth. The rest of the office cheered them on.

“I got your purse,” someone exclaimed and put it on the table.

Sonia pulled off her blouse to reveal a black laced bra that contained her massively enhanced breasts. She walked over to her purse and produced a huge bag of cocaine.

“Shit,” Brad laughed as walked up to her.

Sonia took a huge it. Others quickly followed suit. Brad walked up to her and kissed her on the mouth.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” she laughed.

He pulled off her bra and her huge breasts flopped out. He nipples were large and puffy and stood fully erect. Brad leaned in and began to suck on her nipples and pushed his fingers in her pussy.

“Damn,” Brad laughed.

Someone turned the music up louder. An old Tupac song blared on the speakers. More people took advantage of the coke.

“Everybody get naked,” someone yelled.

Suddenly nearly everyone began to strip off their clothes. A big pile formed near the door. Sonia was sucking off Brad while Natalia ate her out. Kurt was fucking Laura hard over the table. Other people just watched and jerked off. Janice took a bump of coke off Amanda’s stomach while Dave recorded it. Marcy showed up with several bottles of liquor and beer. She found Natalia and kissed her. They took turns licking Sonia’s shaved and tight pussy. Sonia bent over the desk and Brad began to eat her tight asshole. He jammed his tongue as deep as he could into her asshole. Sonia grunted and moaned with delight. Kurt jammed his cock in her mouth while Dave began to fuck Laura. Marcy and Natalia began to 69 while someone jerked off over them. Brad kissed Sonia on the mouth after he stopped eating her ass.

“Like the taste of your ass,” he asked.

“Yes,” she exhaled.

Brad worked his way down her body and began to fuck her pussy. Natalia put her pussy over Sonia’s face and she began to taste her dyke pussy. Marcy broke from her lesbian instincts and began to eat Brad’s ass while he fucked Sonia. Marcy’s tongue in his ass felt amazing as he fucked Sonia. He didn’t see it, but Laura pushed Marcy’s face deep into his ass. She pushed her tongue deep into his ass.

“Want to fuck my ass,” Sonia asked Brad.

“Fuck yeah,” he replied.

He pulled out of her and Laura began to suck his dick. Natalia meanwhile began to eat Kurt’s ass while Dave fucked her. They took more shots and bumps of coke as their orgy continued.

Brad lubed up his cock and gently pushed it into Sonia’s ass.

“Ow,” she whimpered as his cock began to push into her ass.

Her ass was tight and felt amazing. Brad pressed into her ass as Marcy and Natalia began to kiss him. Laura pushed Dave out of the way and jumped on the table and spread her legs. She grabbed Sonia’s head and pushed her face onto her cunt. It took a few thrusts to get her ass to loosen up. He slammed his hips forcefully into her ass. Sonia tried to moan as Laura forced her mouth on her pussy. Brad kept fucking her ass while people around him were also fucking. Laura pushed Marcy’s face hard onto her pussy. Someone finally changed the music and Christmas music filled the room. Brad fucked Sonia harder and harder as the

“I want cum,” she yelled as Brad pushed his dick deep into her ass.

Brad, Dave, Kurt and three other male employees stood over Sonia as she took turns sucking them off. Soon Kurt couldn’t take it anymore and shot his load over her face. Dave and the three others blasted her face with their hot seed.

“Good,” she laughed as she looked up at Brad, “wanted yours last.”

“Yes,” Brad exhaled as he stroked his cock.

He jammed his cock into her face and shot a massive load onto her face. She swallowed some of it. But most of it slipped onto her fake tits.

“Grab my phone,” Brad laughed.

Natalia brought him his phone.

“Thanks,” he laughed.

He pulled up the camera and took a few pictures of Sonia in all her cum covered glory.

“Oh and one more thing Sonia,” Kurt said.

“What,” she asked as she began to stand up.

“You’re fired bitch,” he yelled.

The entire office began to laugh and cheer.

“Get the fuck out of here,” Natalia yelled.

“Fuck you then,” Sonia yelled.

Sonia was covered in cum and sweat as she walked out onto the office floor. Someone threw her purse and keys out to her. She collected it and walked naked to the elevator.

“That Jehovah’s Witness is fucking crazy,” Brad laughed.

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